Shekinah, the glory of God, Revealed in the Body

There is so much confusion around us about what love really is. After all, for many people, saying "I love you," is really just a way of rationalizing the notion that it's okay to have another sexual fling. And, for many other people, saying "I love you," is primarily an attempt to take someone's emotions hostage, making the person some sort of psychological prisoner.

We can learn what real love is by looking at the God who is love. God's love gives. That's what love does. God gives us life, gives to us all of the created world, and then gives us the freedom to choose to give ourselves to one another.

This is the criteria we're going to use in all of our relationships to determine what is and is not love. Love gives and never uses. No form of using, not even mutually agreed upon using, can ever approximate or in any way contribute to bringing about real love.

For some of us this is hard to imagine, because our culture tells us that our sexuality is almost synonymous with the urge to use each other. But that kind of sexuality can only lead to shame and remorse and the death of love.

None of us can ever be fulfilled or happy so long as we look in the mirror and see a user looking back at us. None of us can be happy lying down next to someone who thinks that we can be reduced to an object to be used.

Using violates the very language of our bodies. Our bodies do in fact have a language. We can read the purpose of our creation in the language of our bodies because of the redemption which Christ has won for us. We can look upon our own bodies, and upon each other's bodies, and recognize in a certain sense what Adam and Eve saw when they looked upon each other's bodies in the Garden, naked and without shame.

What they saw, what we are capable of seeing, is that their bodies made it possible for them to make a gift of themselves to each other. They recognized that each was in a way made for the other, that they were in fact called to become one body. They recognized that they had the capacity to give themselves to one another in a way that would make them partners with God in giving life. And they were not ashamed, because were not tempted to use, but only to give.

Shame entered the garden with sin, when they realized that they were now prone to selfishness and using in the way they treated one another's bodies. But because of the gift we have in Jesus, we can see past that shame, past that sin, and recognize the truth of the human body. No human being can ever find fulfillment in using, but only in giving, and this fact is written not only in our consciences, but in the language of our bodies.

Here we have one of the most profound and effective ways for us to share the Gospel message with this culture, in this new millennium. Everyone, no matter how secular, is capable of discerning the fundamental truth presented here.

Our bodies are not objects to be used. We were made to give and to receive love. Using never leads to giving. Reject using, choose to give, and we will attain the desires of our hearts.

As we go forward in dating and courtship, we should continually strive to discern whether each relationship is truly giving, or has descended to the level of using--for using is the death of love.

Next, before we delve into the essence of truly love-giving relationships, we're going to take a moment to do an autopsy on the sort of dead relationship which is most prevalent in our culture.